Gender Reveal Party

About 6 months ago, October-ish, I checked my email and among the many emails I routinely delete I found an Evite for a "Gender Reveal Party." Go ahead and marinate on that phrase for a moment...."Gender Reveal Party"........

Here is what immediately came to my filthy, gutter residing, confused mind...

A group of mostly un-fit people wearing only khaki trench coats and brown paper-bags over their heads (with holes cut out for eyes of course.) They're standing in a circle in a dimly lit, cellar type room. Then, suddenly someone says "1, 2, 3 now!" and they all whip open their trench coats to reveal their gender. Then commences some kind of weird, kinky, festival of.....

I'll stop there.



Obviously, that was not the party I was invited to. It turns out, a "Gender Reveal Party" is where a pregnant couple invites their closest friends and family to an event where they "reveal" the "gender" of the child they've conceived. It's a surprise party! I accepted the Evite.

A few weeks later, I was at the party. It had a pumpkin theme complete with pumpkin cupcakes with blue and pink frosting. You could eat "Sloppy Joe's or Jill's" and make a prediction as to whether the baby is a boy or girl on a poster hanging on the wall. There was also a large banner made of paper pumpkins strung together that said "He or She? What Will Our Lil Pumpkin Be?"

Eventually, the hosts tallied the predictions of the group which favored a girl. Next, the couple went through a series of old wives tales that are said to predict the gender of the baby. They dangled their wedding ring over her belly to see which way it swung and rattled off various cravings and aversions. The wives tales predicted a boy.

Then we watched while they worked to get both their parents and other family members into a group call on Skype so they could perform the big reveal. This took several minutes. I attempted to help with my "technical support" experience but just ended up embarrassing myself.

Eventually, everyone was online and the big reveal was underway. Earlier that day, they had the appointment where the gender is detected. They asked the doctor to put the result into an envelope which they gave to a friend.  Along with the envelope, they gave their friend a cupcake with a hole carved out and a tube of pink frosting and a tube of blue frosting. The friend then opened the envelope and and filled the cupcake with the corresponding color of frosting. Can you imagine the responsibility!? In a dramatic and hushed moment, the couple bit into the cupcake together to reveal... PINK FROSTING! The crowd roared and it was glorious and magical. The parents on Skype were confused and then required separate phone calls in the other room while the guests went back for seconds of Sloppy JILL'S.

A Gender Reveal Party. Sometimes I think Pinterest may be over-inspiring us to host parties for occasions that are meant to be held in private. Of course, this is just an opinion. Maybe I'm just short on people in my life that I think would care to come to a party all about the gender of my baby. (Then also expect them to attend a baby shower a few months later.) I'm also pretty cynical and sarcastic and enjoy poking fun at things, which I recognize are not the greatest human qualities. Honestly, it was truly a quaint and charming party. I admire the creativity that went into it and am genuinely happy for the couple.

However, for my next pregnancy, I do plan to outdo them by hosting a "Pregnancy Reveal" party where we'll invite all our friends and I'll pee on a stick while face-timing with our parents. Meanwhile, guests can munch on Baby-Back Ribs or.....  Scrambled Eggs?

I better start checking Pinterest for ideas.