Thursday, April 25, 2013

Meeting DulceCandy

Dulce Candy (her online name) is an internet beauty/fashion guru. It's hard to explain my... fine I'll admit it... infatuation with Dulce Candy.  I suppose it all started back in 2008 when Mike and I first got engaged and started planning our wedding. I wanted to do my own makeup and was scouring YouTube for makeup tutorials. Eventually I came across DulceCandy87's YouTube channel.

At the time when I started watching her, she was a mechanic in the US Army and had just returned from serving in Iraq. She bragged that her pack box was heavier than anyone else's because it was full of beauty magazines. Her early videos were low quality, web-cam style home videos in a dark messy bedroom (of which she proudly gave a video tour)

(circa 2009)

Today Dulce Candy, is a bonefied YouTube Guru, specializing in all things beauty related: hair, make-up, fashion, nail-care, etc. Now, her videos are pretty much professional productions. She is flown to major cities (NYC, Paris) for product launches, magazine shoots, etc. and companies mail her products to review on her YouTube channel. She has her own online clothing store, has ads all over her blog and youtube channel and does appearances.

Homegirl has made it. Big time.

For those of you that know me, you know I'm not particularly "high maintenance" when it comes to hair and make-up etc. I just don't care to spend the time on all that unless I'm going to some fancy shindig like the annual company holiday party or someone's wedding....that's about it. Because of this, buying make-up and hair products feel like a waste of money to me.

So why do I follow Dulce Candy on YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, her blog and her online store?

And why am I SUPER FREAKING EXCITED to meet her when she comes to San Francisco this weekend for a "millionth subscriber" meet and greet celebration event at the Benefit Brow Bar in Macy's in Union Square?

Why I thought you'd never ask, I'll tell you why.

It partly has to do with the sound of her voice, then her unintentional hilariousness, and finally all the pretty things she has.

I find her voice very relaxing.
Throughout my life, there have been a few memorable people who, to me, have extremely soothing voices: 1) my 8th grade English teacher  2) a massage therapist that came to the office I worked at a few years ago and 3) Dulce Candy

Dulce Candy has a very "valley girl" voice with an, albeit waning, Mexican accent. So, when she says certain things, like the number 3 for example, it sounds like "th'dee." Also, she seriously annunciates her S's which is super silky sounding too.  Her voice is softer and quieter in her earlier videos. I think someone gave her some coaching because now she's much louder and bubblier which isn't quite as enchanting, but I still enjoy her videos for other reasons. To this day, if I'm having a stressful day at work, I'll put on headphones, and stream her old videos as background noise.

This is very weird. I know.

She makes me LOL, but not on purpose.
I can't understand how SNL has not done a spoof of the whole YouTube beauty guru scene. It's seriously hilarious. TONS of girls make weekly videos of all the crap they bought, then demo the outfits or makeup products.

Dulce Candy will do hilarious things like suddenly become out of breath from getting so excited and talking too fast about something new she bought or how much she loves her new foundation. She'll mis-pronounce words or forget how to say "cilantro" in English... (it's still cilantro.) She'll stop talking mid-sentence and stare directly into the camera and say "oh my god, what was that? I think someone's in my house!"

She recently did a "Whats in My Purse" video which was exceptionally hilarious. This is a common beauty guru video topic where they go through every item they keep in their purse. Dulce will do one of these about once a year. And of course, her purse is huge so this video was 13 minutes long. One of my favorite parts  (at the 10:00 minute mark) is where she pulls out her key-chain which is HUGE and contains about 5 different mini antibiotic hand-sanitizers and lip glosses. She goes on to talk about every tchotchke on her key-chain. It's so great. Seriously.

All the Pretty Things!
At the end of the day, I'm a red blooded female who likes pretty things as much as the next chick. And while I might not apply all this to my own lifestyle, I just enjoy watching and looking and admiring.
Her haul videos (aka "look at all the stuff I bought" videos) are just wonderfully glamorous spectacles- a pink and clueless fantasy world I can just drift into for 5-20 minutes.

So, there you have it.

I'll be sure to post about my experience at the meet and greet. It should be great considering I get extremely awkward around "famous" people.

xoxo, smooches, lylas


Thursday, April 18, 2013

Kelsey Logan: Hand Model

Well, it finally happened. I had my big break. I'd like to thank you all for your love and support all these years while I worked tirelessly to harness my craft.

I've found my calling, hand modeling.

I recently started making bi-weekly appointments with Pinkies Nail Salon in San Ramon for shellac polish changes. I don't routinely wear makeup or do my hair. But having decent nails is a small win for me. I feel "put together" by only really doing something every 2 weeks. Lacey, my favy nail tech, is awesome. Not only does her work last longer than anyone else's, but she has beautiful tattoes on her arms that are in gorgeous coordinating  hues of pink and mint green. These tats are seriously really pretty. She has one of a Chanel No. 5 perfume bottle. Anyway, a few weeks ago, I was in a springy mood and went with a mint green hue. I hadn't jumped into the mint craze yet (no colored skinny jeans for me) and wanted to go with a "boyish" color as a tribute to the fact that we had just learned we're having a boy!

Lacey was quite pleased with the results! Apprently green looks good on my pale wrinkly hands and damaged short nails (No pre-natal vitamins can stop these guys from splintering and peeling.) She took a picture and posted it on the Pinkies Nail Salon Yelp page!! Yup, that's me!

As you can see, I have a knack for this. A real natural talent.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Gender Reveal Party

About 6 months ago, October-ish, I checked my email and among the many emails I routinely delete I found an Evite for a "Gender Reveal Party." Go ahead and marinate on that phrase for a moment...."Gender Reveal Party"........

Here is what immediately came to my filthy, gutter residing, confused mind...
A group of mostly un-fit people wearing only khaki trench coats and brown paper-bags over their heads (with holes cut out for eyes of course.) They're standing in a circle in a dimly lit, cellar type room. Then, suddenly someone says "1, 2, 3 now!" and they all whip open their trench coats to reveal their gender. Then commences some kind of weird, kinky, festival of.....
I'll stop there.

Obviously, that was not the party I was invited to. It turns out, a "Gender Reveal Party" is where a pregnant couple invites their closest friends and family to an event where they "reveal" the "gender" of the child they've conceived. It's a surprise party! I accepted the Evite.

A few weeks later, I was at the party. It had a pumpkin theme complete with pumpkin cupcakes with blue and pink frosting. You could eat "Sloppy Joe's or Jill's" and make a prediction as to whether the baby is a boy or girl on a poster hanging on the wall. There was also a large banner made of paper pumpkins strung together that said "He or She? What Will Our Lil Pumpkin Be?"

Eventually, the hosts tallied the predictions of the group which favored a girl. Next, the couple went through a series of old wives tales that are said to predict the gender of the baby. They dangled their wedding ring over her belly to see which way it swung and rattled off various cravings and aversions. The wives tales predicted a boy.

Then we watched while they worked to get both their parents and other family members into a group call on Skype so they could perform the big reveal. This took several minutes. I attempted to help with my "technical support" experience but just ended up embarrassing myself.

Eventually, everyone was online and the big reveal was underway. Earlier that day, they had the appointment where the gender is detected. They asked the doctor to put the result into an envelope which they gave to a friend.  Along with the envelope, they gave their friend a cupcake with a hole carved out and a tube of pink frosting and a tube of blue frosting. The friend then opened the envelope and and filled the cupcake with the corresponding color of frosting. Can you imagine the responsibility!? In a dramatic and hushed moment, the couple bit into the cupcake together to reveal... PINK FROSTING! The crowd roared and it was glorious and magical. The parents on Skype were confused and then required separate phone calls in the other room while the guests went back for seconds of Sloppy JILL'S.

A Gender Reveal Party. Sometimes I think Pinterest may be over-inspiring us to host parties for occasions that are meant to be held in private. Of course, this is just an opinion. Maybe I'm just short on people in my life that I think would care to come to a party all about the gender of my baby. (Then also expect them to attend a baby shower a few months later.) I'm also pretty cynical and sarcastic and enjoy poking fun at things, which I recognize are not the greatest human qualities. Honestly, it was truly a quaint and charming party. I admire the creativity that went into it and am genuinely happy for the couple.

However, for my next pregnancy, I do plan to outdo them by hosting a "Pregnancy Reveal" party where we'll invite all our friends and I'll pee on a stick while face-timing with our parents. Meanwhile, guests can munch on Baby-Back Ribs or.....  Scrambled Eggs?

I better start checking Pinterest for ideas.